It's Not All Karma

I’m the product of a dysfunctional family.  We weren’t dysfunctional on purpose; it just worked out that way.  My parents, well meaning I suppose, did the best they were capable of.  But some of the lessons I learned when I was growing up have not served me well.  I am not blaming my upbringing for any of my problems; I have done very well fucking-up things on my own, thank you.   It’s just that some of the coping techniques I have developed, based on what I learned as a child, don’t work, or are counter-productive.

For example, disagreement was seen as disobedience, or worst, disrespect.  I learned to just keep quiet.  But that didn’t always work, because I was a kid.  And because the adults I was confronting were often drunk, or just stupid, or both.  I learned to walk away.  And that seemed to work pretty well.

I have walked away from many things over the years: two wives, several girl friends, a whole bunch of jobs, and lots of people who might have become friends.   What I never learned was how to walk back.  Self-righteous stubbornness: I don’t know if this learned or genetic, probably a bit of both.  I think the clinical term is asshole.

This interlude of introspection was brought to you by Jameson's fine Irish whiskey.